Police Officer: Hello. 24th Precinct. Officer Jones speaking.
Man: Help. Yeah, uh, it was wild, I mean really bizarre.
Police Officer: Calm down sir! Now, what do you want to report?
Man: Well, I’d like to report a UFO sighting.
Police Officer: A what?
Man: What do you mean “what?” An unidentified flying object!
Police Officer: Wait, tell me exactly what you saw.
Man: Well, I was driving home from a party about three hours ago, so it was about 2:00 AM, when I saw this bright light overhead.
Police Officer: Okay. And then what happened?
Man: Oh, man. Well, it was out of this world. I stopped to watch the light when it disappeared behind a hill about a kilometer ahead of me.
Police Officer: Alright. Then what?
Man: Well, I got back in my car and I started driving toward where the UFO landed.
Police Officer: Now, how do you know it was a UFO? Perhaps you only saw the lights of an airplane [No], or the headlights of an approaching car [No]. Things like that happen, you know.
Man: Well if it was that, how do you explain “the BEAST”?
Police Officer: What do you mean, “the BEAST”?
Man: Okay. I kept driving for about five minutes when all of a sudden, this giant, hairy creature jumped out in front of my car.
Police Officer: Oh, yeah. Then what?
Man: Well, then, the beast picked up the front of my car and said, “Get out of the car. I’m taking you to my master!” Something like that.
Police Officer: Wow? A hairy alien who can speak English! Come on!
Man: I’m not making this up, if that’s what you’re suggesting. Then, when I didn’t get out of my car, the beast opened the car door, carried me on his shoulders to this round-shaped flying saucer, and well, that’s when I woke up alongside the road. The beast must have knocked me out and left me there.
Police Officer: Well, that’s the best story I’ve heard all night, sir. Now, have you been taking any medication, drugs, or alcohol in the last 24 hours? You mentioned you went to a party.
Man: What? Well, I did have a few beers, but I’m telling the truth.
Police Officer: Okay, okay. We have a great therapist that deals with THESE kinds of cases.
Man: I’m not crazy.
Police Officer: Well, we’ll look into your story. Thank you.