Girl: Dad, can I go to a movie with Sharon?
Dad: Yeah, sure, but wait. Weren’t you supposed to get a report card sometime this past week?
Girl: Well, yeah. Can I call Sharon now?
Dad: Uh-hum. You didn’t answer my question. Did you receive it or not?
Girl: I love you, Dad! You’re the best!
Dad: Don’t try to butter me up. I can guess that your answer means that you didn’t do well in some of your classes?
Girl: Well, my English teacher’s soooo boring, and he blows up every time someone talks.
Dad: In other words, you’re not doing so well?
Girl: Uh, a C . . . minus.
Dad: Oh. Well, how are you doing in your Spanish class? You said you liked that one.
Girl: Well, I do, but I forgot to turn in a couple of assignments, and I had problems on the last test. All those verbs tripped me up. I get them all mixed up in my head!
Dad: Okay, and what about algebra?
Girl: Ah, I’m acing that class. No sweat.
Dad: Oh!
Girl: Can I go now?
Dad: And how are you doing in history?
Girl: Oh, that’s my favorite class. Mr. Jones is always passing out candy if you know the answers to his questions.
Dad: Great. Now, I have a bright daughter with tooth decay.
Girl: Ah, Dad. Can I go now?
Dad: You can go if you answer my history question. How old am I?
Girl: Uh, fifty-five?
Dad: Fifty-five! You just failed a math and history test at the same time!
Girl: Dad . . .
Dad: Well, okay, but you need to come straight home from the movie, and you need to practice your clarinet.
Girl: Oh, I forgot about that grade.
Dad: What?
Girl: Gotta run, Dad.